How to Deal with Life’s Road Blocks

by Leah E. Reinhart

Everyone Suffers from Life’s Road Blocks

It’s been awhile since I’ve written a blog due to life’s road blocks. We all have them, but I was hit hard with some devastating ones. My father-in-law passed at the end of May and my daughter and son-in-law lost their baby boy, my grandson, in her 30th weeks of her pregnancy in August. The latter death was a punch in the gut. I believe it put me in a depression. So what are we supposed to do when life throws you a road block?

You lean into it. Feel your feelings and let your emotions do what they need to do. That’s what you do. You can’t suppress your feelings because they will manifest in all sorts of unwanted things such as illness, depression, or anger. Of course there are many ways to cope, but this is my process. That is why I haven’t written anything in a long time. I gave myself permission to grieve and take time off to process and accept what had happened to my daughter.

Things Happen for Reasons

“Things happen for reasons.” isn’t a very helpful statement to the person experiencing a loss during life’s road blocks. And shouldn’t be said to anyone going through some horrific tragedy. But for me, deep down I do believe that. We may never know the why in this lifetime, but I do believe there are life lessons to be learned in these tragedies. One observation, is that you should never take life for granted. Life can change on a dime sending you into a tailspin. The real question is how adaptable are you? The reason I ask that question, is you can’t control everything and it’s the adaptable ones are the ones that can move on from despair. One will never forget nor should you, but life goes on with or without you.

Another thing I find interesting is that your brain doesn’t know the difference from past or future. It only knows information in the present. This means when you are playing over and over in your mind of something negative like a one of life’s road blocks, the brain can’t release the necessary chemicals to balance your brain, leaving you feeling drained and unmotivated by the activities that used to get you going. You feel stuck, like when the road is blocked. https://universityhealthnews.com/daily/depression/what-causes-depression/

The Good News When it Comes to Road Blocks

The good news about any situation is change is inevitable. Nothing stays the same including road blocks, they open up eventually. You might have to take a detour, but there will be options to get you unstuck or out of the road block. Now that we know your brain only thinks of things in the present, you can plant thoughts in your brain that will allow the chemical to be released to get you motivated again. It won’t be easy, I’m not saying that at all. It will take effort on your part.

Being Proactive Isn’t Easy

How do you get started to move past the road blocks in your lives? You will have to force yourself to take baby steps. Go outside and walk. Oxygen it vital for the health of your brain. Like I said, you will most likely have to force yourself due to the lack of motivation you are experiencing from your personal road block. Exercise isn’t always used in psychotherapy, but I hope therapists will add this to their therapy, because studies are out there showing how beneficial it is. https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/large-study-finds-clear-association-between-fitness-and-mental-health#:~:text=Researchers%20have%20reported%20a%20clear%20link%20between%20low,to%20a%20greater%20risk%20of%20worse%20mental%20health.

Food is another factor in brain health. Sugar creates highs along with crashes which is not helpful during road blocks. You don’t need any extra blocking during this time. If you eat too much of anything especially comfort food, it leaves you feeling bloated, tired, and not wanting to do much of anything. It is extremely important to nourish your mind and body at this time, which goes against everything you’re wanting at the moment. Yet, the amount of food will affect your sleep by acid reflux or indigestion. We can’t discount the importance of sleep. That’s when your body is restoring itself.

We can’t underestimate the power of affirmations and gratitude. If you say them enough, eventually your brain will believe what you’re saying. It’s like you’re brainwashing your brain, but with positivity. Neuroplasticity is fascinating. https://thebestbrainpossible.com/affirmations-brain-depression-anxiety/

Road Blocks Are Temporary and Permanent Simultaneously

Road blocks are temporary and permanent simultaneously and an inevitable part of life. Some of them are more debilitating than others, leaving us frozen. Certain road blocks will leave you forever changed. If the road has washed away, it will never be that same road again. A different road will be put in or a new path altogether will be used. Sometimes the Universe throws a monkey wrench into our personal plans to point us in the direction we are meant to go.

Death is the one of the worst road blocks in life one can experience. Life will be changed and you can’t undo death. But life does go on, just very differently. When you come up to your first or next road block, know you are not alone. The way you’ve handled your road block, may be the map you use to help someone during their time of their road block. No one has ever said that life is smooth sailing. The one thing that is constant is change. Nothing stays the same including the path you’re on in this journey called life.

At the end of the day, I understand that life has road blocks, and life is like school – you’ll be tested; we gotta pass it.

DJ Khaled